Humor writing, original comedy content, pop culture analysis, and more from comedian and friend Aaron Hertzog. To get weekly updates delivered right to your inbox sign up for my mailing list.
Whoops! Your made-up mantra summoned a real ancient demon from hell.
You should have paid for the meditation classes.
Seven Habits of Super Fit People (Repost)
Just a few simple steps can take you from being a gross-disgusting-creature-not-fit-to-be-called-a-human to someone worthy of other people’s time and attention. You may think it’s impossible to achieve your health and fitness goals, but take it from these success stories, it’s easier than you may think!
I fear that I have become some kind of featured extra for the influencer at my gym
And I do not like it one bit.
Crazy week, here are replies I owe the group chat
Plus, timestamps so you know what I'm talking about...
The New News
Why trust the mainstream media when you can get your news from any one of these modern sources?
Become an AI Master with these helpful prompts
The only guide you need to become a ruler of generative AI.
a list of times when violence totally is the answer, actually
don't fall for all this "violence is never the answer" crap
A man has no children (that he knows of).
“Not that I know of,” I say, with a wink and a smile, to the hotel bartender who asked me if I had any children. Her smile tells me she’s picking up what I’m putting down, though it fades as she turns away to pour my shot and draw my beer from the tap.
Hey, Mom and Dad! I took your financial advice!
I hope you are proud of your boy. I took your financial advice to heart. I saved money whenever I could. I never bought things I couldn’t afford. And I never, ever, no matter what got a credit card.
A short list of things I could have done instead of watching The Brutalist three times
Six Hundred and Forty Five Minutes of my Life