Comedy Aaron Hertzog Comedy Aaron Hertzog

I'm a Marketing Specialist and I can confidently say you've been tricked into liking everything you have ever liked.

I got bad news for you, and that news is that you don’t know shit.

You think that you’re a discerning, unique human with refined, well-developed taste. You are actually a puppet being manipulated either by strings or a hand up the butt; the choice is up to the puppeteer.

More bad news, I’m the puppeteer, and I prefer manipulation by butt hand.

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Comedy Aaron Hertzog Comedy Aaron Hertzog

If my English teacher married my gym teacher...

Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce are engaged (to be married)! They announced their big news via Taylor’s Instagram, where she captioned the series of adorable photos with the cheeky “your English teacher and your gym teacher are getting married”. This made me wonder what would happen if such an engagement were to occur in my small-ass hometown.

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Aaron Hertzog (comedian, writer, friend) turns his thoughts, feelings, weird obsessions, and tiny meltdowns into comedy. Dumb thoughts and sharp takes about the cultural absurdities and common anxieties of modern life. To get weekly updates delivered right to your inbox, sign up for my mailing list.